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Monkey Goes 'Ape,' Toilets are a Wash-Out

A rhesus monkey escaped from a cage in a circus near Berlin this month. After traveling about six miles in five days, it had developed an appetite and entered a pizzeria in a small German town.

The staff was surprised when a one and a half foot tall "customer" showed up in the pizzeria, but tried to keep the situation under control until the authorities arrived. They used lettuce and rolls to tempt the monkey into the women's bathroom and tried to keep it calm. However, once cornered, "Lala" went 'ape.' She began busting up the place, breaking a vase, tossing all the paper towels into the sink, and then turning on the tap.

Both the women's and men's bathrooms, the kitchen, and part of the dining room got flooded before the animal was subdued. The owner is expected to get a $5,700 reward for capturing the monkey. -- the Editor Source: Reuters, July 4, 2003

Rioting Greek Fans Set Fire To Dog

A black-and-white husky was smeared with tar and set on fire by rioting soccer fans after the Greek Cup final, police said Wednesday. The dog was attacked by fans of Aris Thessaloniki after the team was defeated 1-0 Saturday by crosstown rival PAOK. After the game, Aris fans set fires in Toumba Stadium and later smashed cars and property. The dog was apparently picked on for its colors: PAOK play in black and white. An animal welfare group found and treated the husky for burns and an injured eye, and informed the police Wednesday, authorities said. -- FOXSports

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Odd Couples

Crazy for Animals (or is she just crazy?)

"I am not only uninterested in having children. I am opposed to having children. Having a purebred human baby is like having a purebred dog; it is nothing but vanity, human vanity." ~ Ingrid Newkirk, President and co-founder of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA)

Newkirk's last will and testament: "That the meat of my body, or a portion thereof, be used for a human barbeque...my skin, or a portion thereof, be removed and made into leather products...my feet be removed and umbrella strands or other ornamentation be made from them...my eyes be removed, mounted and delivered to the administrator of the Environmental Protection Agency..."

Newkirk on her divine mandate: "I am just trying to make the best case for animals. That is clearly what I was put on this earth to do. Even after I am gone, I will try to continue."

-- From the article "The Extremist: The woman behind PETA," by Michael Specter in New Yorker magazine

More Animal Tales Page Content

  • Monkey Goes 'Ape,' Toilets are a Wash-Out
  • Crazy for Animals (or is she just crazy?)
  • Rioting Greek Fans Set Fire To Dog
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